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Why Mohawk is so awesome

So, as you might already know, I’m a procrastinator. If I wasn’t living in Coeur d’Alene right now I’m pretty sure you could drive by my mom’s house in Clark Fork and find my dead body on display in the front yard. I was supposed to have my story in for this issue a week ago. I think. Maybe I was supposed to have it in two weeks ago. Either way, I couldn’t be more late if I had an 8-week old fetus in my belly.

So the big news this month has been the opening of The Idaho Club. After the Golden Bear himself played the 11 holes currently ready for play, the course was officially opened to members on August 29 and will be open to the public for limited play some time in mid-September.

Club pro Mike Deprez has asked me to work there, but it’s a long commute from Coeur d’Alene. Therefore, it’s likely The Idaho Club is looking for males and females to work as forecaddies. I’m not sure about their guidelines but at The Resort you have to be 19 years old, you have to be clean shaven every day, and you have to be able to handle people well. Seeing as how I might need to shave once a week, I qualify without much effort. If you can handle those criteria, you should jump at this opportunity for an amazing summer job. The hours are short and the pay is awesome. That being said, I have a little story about Mohawk.

Mohawk Industries is the leading distributor of flooring materials for the nation. Every year they come out to The Resort for a few days of golf. It’s not normal golf, however; they bring everybody, not just a few executives. Managers, distributors, and even the managers of the stores that they distribute to.

The first weekend of “Mohawk” as we caddies call it, is for the Mohawk employees. The head guys for Mohawk come out and get to golf for three back-to-back days. EVERYTHING is paid for. We caddies looooooove Mohawk because our tip is prepaid. We automatically get 100 dollars a round for caddying for them. And that doesn’t include the individual tips we get from the golfers. Last year at Mohawk I made around 300 dollars a day.

Another reason we love Mohawk is they get anything they want on the beverage cart for free all day. Last year the group I had filled all the extra compartments on our carts full of beer and topped them with a couple bags of ice. Instead of putting beer in ice, they put ice in some beer. The Mohawk guys are nice, low maintenance, and just out to have a good time.

The next week of Mohawk is for the people Mohawk distributes to. They pay for everything: airfare, hotel and golf. Not only that, each golfer gets a nice little gift bag with golf towels, hats, balls, etc. They also get free beverage cart all day as well. Are you wanting to go to work for Mohawk yet?

 Now that you know what Mohawk is, I’ll tell you my little story of why Mohawk has been good for me so far this year. Last Sunday I came in to work not feeling too well. For a week I’ve had this cold sore on the outside of my lip that looks like the creepy guy on 300. His name is Ephialtes, and no, I did not have to look that up, I’m just that big of a nerd. So my day wasn’t looking like it was going to be the best. I got to work and the caddie master handed me my guest slip with the names of the golfers I’m going to be caddying for and my starting hole. It’s a shotgun start - each group starts on a different hole at the same time. I looked at my slip and saw I’d gotten a threesome. That made my day a little better. Normally I would prefer to caddy for a group of four, but I wasn’t feeling like exerting 100 percent  so I felt just three was adequate.

I walked back and changed into the one-piece caddie jumpsuit that we have to wear. I didn’t put a shirt on underneath because it was 6 in the morning and it already felt like it was 80 degrees outside. It was so hot that the news didn’t even give out a temperature, they just said if you’re a caddie, it sucks to be you. I think it wound up being somewhere around 105 that day.

After I set up my carts with ice in the cooler, towels and the guest’s golf clubs, I gathered around with all the other caddies, while my boss explained the tournament. It’s Mohawk, not like I didn’t already know; everybody knew, Mohawk is awesome! After, we took all of the carts down to the driving range so that when the 180 golfers began to arrive, we could just direct them there so they could start warming up. Sometimes a few of the earlybird golfers are already there and get to watch us take the carts down. I don’t understand this, but somehow they are always fascinated with watching a large convoy of golf carts all driving to the range. They look like it’s their first time visiting Jurassic Park.

After we took the carts to the range, some of the caddies helped direct guests to the pro shop and took their clubs to the range. Some caddies get selected to do a few oddball jobs like helping with rental clubs, or greeting guests at the doors of the pro shop. All the rest of us are stuck down at the range. My individual job was to make sure that the pyramids were filled before the round started. The pyramids are the worst! At the driving range, all the range balls are stacked into tiny pyramids that each golfer can use at his pleasure. Making sure they are all filled means that whenever someone runs out of balls, I have to take this pyramid shape frame and fill golf balls in it. Then, when everybody leaves the range, I have to make sure that all 40 of the individual pyramids are left full so that the next tournament or the next golfers that come down have balls to hit. It’s pretty much the worst thing to be stuck doing when you’re trying to get ready to go out on the course. But it was okay, because my day was about to flip around faster than Usain Bolt can run the 200m dash. Did you see that guy? INSANE! He’s 6’5” and ran the 200 in 19.31 seconds! Okay, sorry for birdwalking, or whatever that’s called.

My day was about to get better. One of my guys cancelled. He was stuck in Houston because he missed his flight. So now I had a twosome. Score! But wait, there’s more. Because there was another twosome in the tournament, they decided to group the two together so there would be one less group out on the course. The bad news is, one caddie would be sent home. Aww shucks. I guessed I’d let the other caddie have the group.

I already said that Mohawk is awesome. Here’s why. They still paid me the 100 dollars that every caddie got for being there that day. So I came to work for two hours, didn’t have to work too hard, and I got paid 100 bucks. I can’t complain at all. Then, to top everything off, Mohawk had a breakfast buffet up in the restaurant in the pro shop that I got to go devour after the tournament started.

One more time. I was sick and I didn’t want to exert 100 percent that day. I didn’t have to. I got a free breakfast. I didn’t have to run once and I made 54 dollars an hour including my wage. I love Mohawk.

 

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Dustin Gannon Dustin Gannon says he's a writer because his mama owns a newspaper. At all other times, he's a sportsman, writing both the Sno Biz column, when he's working at Schweitzer Mountain Resort in the wintertime, and Fore! Play, when he's working at the Coeur d'Alene Resort golf course during the summer.

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